Put some sugar on that shoe

First, I was going to write about how I seem to be having a flare-up of foot-in-mouth disease, and I seem to be saying more obnoxious things than usual to people and getting shocked looks. Then I was going to follow that up with a few thoughts about how maybe it's better to be a jerk to people when you first meet them and then have them be pleasantly surprised when you're nice, than the other way around, and have them be disappointed. But then I remembered my resolution to quit openly pointing out my faults and just let people discover them on their own, so just pretend I didn't write any of this.

Instead: Happy Friday the 13th! I know that most of you probably get today off of work so that you can attend to your usual Friday the 13th traditions like breaking mirrors and walking under ladders, but I'll wish you a happy 13th anyway.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: most superstitions have absolutely nothing to do with supernatural punishment and have much more to do with getting disobedient kids to be a little more careful and normal, worldly punishments don't do the trick. "Be careful around that mirror! Those things are expensive!" or "Don't walk under the ladder, you moron! People are working up there! You'll get a paint bucket dropped on your fool head!" or "That was the worst performance of Macbeth EVER! Anyone who mentions it again is fired!" and so on.

One more piece of advice: if you find yourself in a deserted summer camp sometime today, do NOT go to see what that strange noise was by yourself. I hope we've learned that much.